Moms Like Us: Kim

I think that so many of our mommy stresses are related to the fact that we sometimes feel alone in our struggles and frustrations! I know that there is much relief for me those times when I am reminded that we are all in this together, and that we all struggle with these same things on a regular basis! 

I would like to begin a weekly feature, called Moms Like Us where we will meet a mom who we can relate to on a deeper level. 

Our first Mom Like Us, is Kim - she agreed to be a guinea pig for our first week! 

{Meet Kim} 

We asked Kim some questions, so that we can get to know her better. Here are her responses ...

A LITTLE ABOUT YOUR BROOD
I have been married to Greg, a truly amazing man, for a little over seven years, and I have two children, Luke (4), and Anna (2).  A few weeks before we were married, my husband was hired as the youth minister to a church outside of Charleston.  We moved there from Tennessee a couple months after we married, and have lived and served here ever since.

WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST STRUGGLE AS A MOM/WIFE?

  Prioritizing.  Sometimes it seems that being a mother and homemaker are mutually exclusive tasks.  It seems like I can't clean without neglecting my children, and I can't play with my children without neglecting my house!  For awhile after having kids, I struggled with guilt:  whatever I was doing, I felt guilty that I wasn't doing something else.  If I was doing laundry, I needed to be playing with my kids.  If I was playing with my kids, I'd feel bad for not serving more at church.  If I was serving at church, I was worrying that I was neglecting my marriage.  Looking back, it was kind of ridiculous, and I'm getting better at praying about priorities and then letting God lead me through each day.  Still, it is sometimes hard even now to prioritize my time.

WHAT IS THE PURPOSE YOU FEEL GOD HAS CALLED YOU TO? 

Hmmm.  My purpose on earth is to glorify God and to point others to Him.  At different phases of my life, that has meant different things. Right now, I believe that it means pouring love into my children and raising them to love and obey the Lord; making my home a haven both for my family and for others; and making all of my resources available to God to use as He sees fit.

WHAT RESOURCES DO YOU FEEL GOD HAS GIVEN YOU ON A DAILY BASIS, THAT ARE UNIQUE TO YOU?   

Well, I can't say that any are unique to me, but He has given me time, money, a decent work ethic, and a moderate amount of talent at writing.  Probably my most unique "resource" is my husband.  As a youth minister, he is gone a lot of nights and weekends, but he takes advantage of whatever flexibility he has in his schedule to serve his family.  The effort he puts into taking care of the household (mowing the grass, being the family "banker," washing dishes, etc), and the attention he lavishes on my children make my job soooo much easier!  Like I said earlier, he is truly an amazing man.

A YAY ME! FROM THIS WEEK 

I have had much more energy this week b/c I have been eating healthier.  Baby carrots and hummus were both half off at Bi-Lo this week, so they have become a regular snack.  Feta cheese and apples were also half off, and so I have been eating spinach salads with feta and apples for lunch, instead of my usual soup and sandwich.  I guess this is more a "Yay, Grocery Stores!" than "Yay, Me!" but I've been so happy to eat healthy things that I got for really great prices!

DO YOU MAKE YOUR BED EVERYDAY?
Yep.  I try to, for my own sanity.  Oddly, the days I'm most relaxed and content with my life are the days I might let it go undone.  But on the average day, seeing a nice made-up bed throughout the day just makes me happy.

ARE ALL YOUR DISHES DONE RIGHT NOW?
Nope.  Unless we have a baking day or have guests over for dinner, dishes in this house only get washed once a day, at the end of it.  I clean up after each meal, and rinse everything, but I leave the dishes in the sink.  And then...my wonderful husband washes them after I go to bed!  Seriously, I did not ask him to do this.  He's just that good.  So I go to bed every night with dishes in the sink, and then wake up to a nice, clean kitchen.  It's a great way to start the day.

IS YOUR LAUNDRY CAUGHT UP RIGHT NOW?
No, but I'm getting close:).  I am hoping to catch up by the end of the day.  I've actually found that once I get on top of it, it's pretty easy to stay "caught up."  Unfortunately, the only thing EASIER is to get behind again.  Go figure!:)

WHAT IS THE VERSE THAT BRINGS YOU BACK TO THE GROUND WHEN YOU FEEL OUT OF CONTROL?
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."  Prov. 3:5-6.  I find this verse to be very freeing, b/c it clearly defines my role, as well as God's.  My role is to trust God and to acknowledge Him.  His job is to make my paths straight.  I don't have to understand everything or figure it all out on my own.  I just have to trust and acknowledge God.  That's always a comfort to me.

Thanks Kim, for sharing!

If you want to win a book by another Mom Like Us ..check out The Veleveteen Mommy giveaway!

Tips on Tuesday: Mess Free Artists

We are all about making messes in our house! And, Steedly School has given us lots of opportunities to do that in a constructive way...but no less messy :)

One way we have figured out how to take some of the stress away from the mess making, is by making as much stuff disposable as possible (not very green, I know).

For painting, we have found that leftover egg cartons work great. A dozen eggs makes for 2-3 different "pallets" to hold paint in a stable, and no clean up way.

Happy Mess Free Painting ...:)

Quick clean-ups after messy fun ..it works for me!

{be sure to enter to win our giveaway of the week ...The Velveteen Mommy!}

The Velveteen Mommy

I have a personal librarian..or might as well.  My bookish friend shares my love of reading, and we have the passion for similar genres of  Christian fiction. She supplies me with a continuous supply of books, with the benefit of having read them and being able to suggest only the best story lines and thus the best use of my limited reading time..oh, she buys them so I dont have to rack up $$ of debt to the library :)

One little book that she passed on is called the Velveteen Mommy, by Jenn Doucette.

She has a hilarious outlook on the mommish goings-on that come with this crazy season of so many of our lives right now! I have giggled to myself many times since starting to peruse this super easy read. It is SUPER relatable..its like she is in my head :)

One part that I giggled through was when she was describing an experience in the shower room of a swimming pool, with her then 2 and 3 year old. Her confessing she is a "germaphobic" makes this excerpt make me about wet myself :)

...I began vigorously scrubbing our two year old, Katie. Midway through the purification process, I happened to look up at my sanitized son. To my shock and absolute horror, he was crouched on the ground over the shower drain scooping the water in the little circle. It was an echoy room, and i hear myself saying "J.J., now J.J. You need to stop, J.J., that is dirty water. Now honey, icky, icky, icky. While in mid-nag, he look up at me, made eye contact and in slow motion went, "Ssllluuurrrppp!"

  ...My considerations were Tevye-like, reminiscent of the poor indecisive father from Fiddler on the Roof: One on hand, Ipecac will induce vomitting, which I dont want to deal with on this floor; On the other hand, bleach may do more internal damage than any germ or critter could ever do."

...I must admit that i wasnt able to conjure up the will to kiss him anywhere near the lips for a very, very long time. To this day, years later, an occasional unknown virus will crop up and I'll worry and wonder if there could still be any lingering effect from his little sip from the shower.

I want to share this book with a Mom like me out there ...so I want to give one away this week!

To enter to win, you can do one or all of the following ..one entry each!

* Leave a Comment: You can leave a comment telling a funny anecdote from your own mothering experience, or if you have read her book and what you thought!
* Follow Me:  On the sidebar, click on "Follow" ...then come and leave a comment to let me know! 
* Be a Fan: On the sidebar, click on the "Facebook" link  ..follow LPLS 's facebook page then leave a comment to let me know!
* Link From Your Blog: a quick shout out will be great!  ..then leave a link as a comment!


Make sure to check back this week to check out others' comments, and  to see if you won! I will draw one week from today!

Dymanic Priorities

I think every book on stress makes a point about the need to prioritize. We need to make a mental, if not actual list of the things that are the most important to us.

Of course, I would agree that knowing what you are aiming for and why is a great thing to do in order to get your head on straight. I think most of us here would say that our priorities in order would be God,  marriage, kids, us, home  ...I think that is right, and good.

But one think I have noted lately is that our priorities are somewhat dynamic, given the day, the resources and several other variables that have yet to be determined today.

While in general these priorities are always present and if a gun was put to our heads they would be placed in that order ..in reality there are times when we have to switch stuff around in order to meet the needs of those around us, those we are responsible for molding long term.

Like, for instance ...when Steedly School is in session, my kids being the focus of my use of resources at the moment, but I feel like I am about to lose my mind with impatience and frustration. Kids are way more important than me, right?

Priorities need to do some rearranging, in order for me to get my own head in the game. I need to go eat, take a break, take a breath, take a shower ...I need to put me first, for the sake of the ultimate priority of my children.

With hubby in nursing school and working full time (can you say SUPER dad!) there have been some stressful moments when there are deadlines and tests to be studied for. Our marriage always comes first, but then again there are times when I have to chose that today is not the best one for a date night, and that the priority is him focusing on the task he has taken on.

I really feel like there are days when priorities have to be evaluated on a minute to minute basis! I feel like I need to reevaluate and redirect regularly throughout the day, in order to use my resources best.

Ultimately, our priorities stay the same ...but the order they are in (aside from God first, but He is kinna always there and present in everything, hopefully) is dynamic and can be based on what we have available to us, and the needs of those around us.

If you are feeling stressed right now ...is it because you need to rearrange your priorities temporarily? 

Operation: OBEY

"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who are trained by it." Hebrews 12:11

 

I am not sure if it is the new baby, the new school year, the new lifestyle (homeschooling) ..but we are in a serious rebellious mode around here. It may, also be...that I have children at all, who are almost 4 and 6 ..yeah, that may be it.

Whatever the reason, I am realizing that I am needing some direction on teaching character to these little men. I know the "rules" ..be consistent, teach them now and dont wait til they are teenagers, discipline them with love and not anger.  I know that all in my head, but we are still falling short. Or, at least we are growing out of what we have been doing in the past.

It is with this mind set that I stumbled on a really great resource for teaching godly character to children, Kids of Integrity is a project of Focus on the Family. It is offered free of charge, but is worth WAY more :)  This program offers prayers for parents and children, scripture references, practical ideas for teaching character, discussion questions, projects, games and much direction in teaching these vital lessons.

Of the 16 character quality lessons they offer, we chose obedience as the one that needs the most immediate attention for these Steedly Boys. 

Using Kids of Integrity as a guide, we started this morning's school session with a new memory verse, a prayer, encouragement to seek the Spirit in help to learn these lessons,  and a fun project to get the ball rolling.

"If you love me, you will obey my command." John 14:15

We painted our footprints to show we are following God where he tells us to go, and then placed hearts on our toes...to remind us that if we love Him, then we will obey. They get to color in the hearts when they obey cheerfully (today, cheerfully is the operative word :)  ..Ty at least filled in his hearts "cheerfully" :) ..or, silly ..I will take it :)

Stealing from my mom's method of creative discipline, we made a nickle jar. There are 20 nickels per kid in the jar with the happy face (brought to you by Canon, almost 4). When they are disobedient, or are not cheerful in their obedience, the have to put a nickel in the sad jar. Whatever they have left at the end of the week, is theirs to keep.  I am hoping that since all their nickels are together, they will encourage each other to obey :) ..we will see.

 

The Kids of Integrity stressed the importance of keeping the concept in front of them at all times. One way I decided to do that was to write the word, "OBEY" on about 10 index cards. I added a smiley face sticker to each one. I placed them all over the house, at their level. 

I put them on the bathroom door, on the tv, the computer screen, their bedroom door, the backdoor and on the DVD player in the car. The smiley face is supposed to remind them that it makes God and mommy happy when they .."obey!" 

I have heard Ty say "obey" when he walked out the door the backyard today...and it DID make me happy :) 

Today is the first day, and I really want to stick with this. I tend to be great coming of the gate, but slack off. I want to do this right, teaching obedience AND just raising this boys. 

I feel grossly inadequate most of the time, but I am trying to tap into the resources God has given me for this overwhelming purpose.

Want to do this with me? It will help me keep motivated and focused ...you can check out the Kids of Integrity website, chose a lesson and get started Monday!